Somewhere between summer vacation and the first day of school, mornings got harder. Maybe it's the third child getting ready for school in the morning. Maybe it's because Daddy made the new schedule and there is now a fourth tiny minion of no good morning as well! However, somehow the schedule changed to; get up, stumble downstairs, eat breakfast, go back upstairs and make so much noise you wake up the toddler monster, then get dressed, fight over the toothpaste and sink, and forget where you put your shoes!
I hate mornings! And when it is my turn to walk the children to school in the morning, I hate them even more.
I am not a social person, I just play one on Thursdays. The Oldest monster is is a safety patrol, which means between the yelling and searching and not so fun morning, I have to be alert enough to get them out the door before 8 and within striking distance of the school before 8:10. It also means I must skip with Inch halfway, wait for sneakers to be tied again, tell them to not run head first into traffic, forget my sunglasses and have the sun hit me right in the eyes! Oh and get to the kindergarten door at a time where I am the only parent there. Then being first I must make small talk with the other parents also in desperate need of adult contact!
Yes! This was my morning!
First it was, "They never listen!" then it was, "Oh so you have four boys?" Followed by, "How do you do it?"
I looked around at the other moms at drop off, at that moment every single face turned towards me! Alert with curiosity! Oh yes, how do you do it??
You know my answer?
"I don't know!"
I am lucky, I have a husband who actually participates and my mother lives with me, so if I want I can take a nap, do laundry, make a phone call, go on a date with my husband. Go back to work because I have have a live in baby sitter who works for chocolate, sour cream and onion potato chips and cigarettes! That is barely 12 dollars a day!
Then she said it, the silence started, the argument of Mom's the world over;
"I don't know why people think being a stay at home mom is so glamorous!" As I sit there in the bun I never combed and my oversized hoodie, slippers that I pass off as boots! I thought about it, I really did. I looked at the other mothers looking at me like the Motherhood guru that I most certainly am not! Waiting with held breath for my answer.
Yup, those were my wise words! The first thing that escaped my lips at a time of day I don't like speaking out loud to anyone, not even my kids! Parenting bites! You are always doing your best and it's never good enough! Hence why there is a war between the moms on who has it harder!
We both have it hard because Parenting suck! It sucks more when you have people judging your parenting at every possible angle! That's it. Parenting Blows!
Parenting is half listening to other people and half trial and error.
Parenting doesn't stop when you go to work every day! You just learn to appreciate the 5 to 8 hours you got to leave the house every day.
As a mother who did both I can tell you this, my answer is still the same! Parenting Sucks!
This morning was a prime example! I stumbled around in the dark looking for a pair of jeans, not because I didn't want to disturb someone else, but mainly because light hurts. I dressed and got to the bathroom. I was just getting the toothbrush prepped when the elephant herd of boy children ran up the stairs. Not caring that their baby brother was still sleeping! Inch shoved open the door and asked me to move out of the way. He was almost polite about it, but not really! I watched with a toothbrush in my mouth as he tried to put the pea sized portion of tooth paste on the brush and ended up getting it on the sink.
I glanced at his outfit and shrugged because at least it was matching and fit. I turned to leave and there were two more faces staring at me from the open bathroom door.
I managed to find my coffee mug and heat myself a cup. I barely made it back into the living room when Inch's voice could be heard through the monitor. Ok... four before 8 it is then.
Diaper, bottle, take a sip of coffee.
Smiles catches attitude with grandma over the placement of his shoes! He thinks in the middle of the floor in any room is okay, we have a bucket in the front hall. Head explode number three, just in case you weren't keeping track.
The Oldest came down in a beanie and a short sleeved shirt, patrol belt on! "Don't you think you should put your sweat jacket on?" Eye roll, heavy sighing, guess what kid I cam do that too!
At this point Inch is propped on the arm of the sofa ask his usual 20 questions! Smiles is rolling around on the floor with The Boss; was that six or seven times my head exploded?
Oh and we haven't even left the house yet!
Walk to school!
"Why is it cold?"
"Why can't I walk by myself?"
let's not look before trying to cross the street! Let's worry about what the neighbor children are doing in that sprinkler!
"Mom about Saturday three weeks from now..."
"Oh look a squirrel!"
Finally I can see the last crossing guard before the school, finally I say good bye to the oldest two and it's just me and Inch!
Just me me and Inch for twenty minutes before this mother shows up and starts talking to me, while I keep one eye on my child who says he can now walk the wall one handed! 30 minutes after arrival at the school I am headed back home to the velcro baby I left there with grandma, who may or may not take a nap today.
Yup, parenting sucks!
It is also amazing and rewarding! Terrifying and nerve wracking!
There are so many giggles and hugs and kisses. There is this building of memories and so much love you are totally unsure how you can possibly hold so much!
Parenting is a upside down, roller coaster ride and we are all doing it right! We are all doing it wrong! At the end of the day whether you get up and go to work every day or you are stuck in the prison with the crazy monsters! Parenting is not easy! Parenting is the hardest job you will ever have and you won't know if you were even good at it until your children have children of their own! And even then, you still won't know!
Because Parenting Sucks!